Still Standing

Here's a poem that describes almost perfectly how I have felt since last September. I can't believe that it has been almost a year since Hans started his new job and we have started living apart. My hat goes off and my heart goes out to all military wives. At least I know where my husband is, what he is doing and that he will come home.
While my hat is going off- it goes off to all single parents especially my little sis who has been such a caring mom to her little girl while going through an ugly divorce- God bless her and her daughter, and my folks who have taken them in and have helped them survive this hard time.
I, of course, also tip my hat to all those in past or present military who have sacrificed not only their lives and time but sometimes minds and well-being for the benefit for every member of our nation and the countless of other people that our soliders have helped. God Bless America and our troops who are strong, courageous and committed for the betterment of this world. Sometimes I think that maybe our great nation might feel like this poem too, but thank heavens, "she" is still standing.
I am broken
lost
a part missing
pieces of myself away
alone, not lonely
and still standing

Faith bending
tried
Hollowed, hard
a tree swept by fire
my soul is stripped
but still standing

All spent
wasted
Falling out with fear
Destined like rain to fall
heart hurt and heavy
still standing

Time never passes
in wait
for the unexpected
until at last
clearing comes
I'm still standing

Finally in flight
soaring
Hope finds me
stars within grasp
now I stretch free
still standing

Hmmmmm.... Yeah

WOW! How quickly I lose track of time! I'll just do a quick update for all you out there dying to hear news from the Lovell Family. I seriously will update with pictures and everything one day... soon... I hope. We have been spending a lot of time up in Delta since school got out so we can be with Hans a little bit more. We have played in the sun a lot, chased kitties and have been tending the garden up there. (The garden is a little smaller than we are used to but it still keeps me busy!) I have to be back in Parowan at least 1 day every 7 to water the lawn, the garden there and mow the grass. So really, I keep moving most the time. I relish the time that Tait eats because it means I get to sit down- which doesn't happen usually- ask Hans. People ask me al the time if it is so much harder having three kids. I honestly don't think so. Tait is what keeps my days going and somewhat happy. Who can look at a smiling little baby face without any teeth, or hear a loud baby coo, or even cuddle with a baby for a few minutes and not feel better about life? At first, since Tait was unexpected, I thought this would be so hard, and his joining our family, even at this hard time has been such a great blessing. I have come to look forward to times Hans and I spend together as well as the family time that I took for granted before. And so life continues- not always as we expect it too, but it turns out better than if we could have planned it. The dark clouds really are worth the silver lining!

Birthdays and Kindergarten

Can I honestly believe how old I am. Wow. I just got done registering Gabe for Kindergarten. I have a kid entering the public school system. Craziness. He was so brave for his evaluation and had no porblem answering all the teachers questions, I am so proud of him for not being scared. And then, a few weeks ago, Hiett turned three. Another crazy event to make me realize that time passes so quickly. And.... Tait is now two months old. It doesn't seem like it has been that long, but it in some ways it seems like he has always been here. Insane I know.
Anyway, for Hiett's birthday he wanted to go on a picnic and a hike and then the say after we had a friend party for him, themed after pirates. We had so much fun and only a few minor gliches which really are so funny now. The glitch was mainly the dog eating the birthday cake 15 minutes before the party started. Luckily, my dad and mom were here and my dad ran into Cedar to buy an already made cake that we just stuffed the pirate stuff into. I was so mad... but I didn't cry. And then when we went on oour hike, we didn't realize how steep a climb it was and almost lost a child here or there- I was crazy enough to let Tait come too. Hans carried him while I corraled the boys up and down the mountain. But we had so much fun, and I am so glad that we are still a complete family, and will be fore eternity no matter what happens!